Cemburu ini membunuhku

Sejak kemarin aku merasa sangat cemburu bila melihat dia bersama yang lain. Padahal kami ini bukan siapa-siapa. Aku tau itu, gak bisa dipungkiri hal ini menyiksa batinku. Aku cemburu bahkan pada temanku sendiri. Aku gak mau dia memilih orang lain selain aku. Aku cuma mau dia sama aku. Terkesan egois banget ya?

Hm....

Kalau misalkan ada seseorang yang mau mencintai diriku apa adanya maka akan aku lupakan dirinya dan mencoba mencintai orang yang mencintai ku tanpa syarat apa2 itu. Namun adakah yang mau menerima ku apa adanya? Padahal aku hanya ingin pria yang sederhana, yang bisa jadi imam ku dan mau menerima aku maupun keluarga sebagaimana adanya. Bukankah itu "syarat" yang mudah? Atau ada yang salah dengan diri ku ini hingga tak ada kumbang mau menghampiri?

Inginku mengerti kamu

Aku mencoba untuk mengerti kamu sepenuhnya, tau apapun tentang kamu. Bagaimana sifat kamu? Bagaimana perilaku kamu? Dan beribu bagaimana lagi. Aku cuma ingin mencoba menyelami hingga dasarnya kehidupan kamu. Aku terpesona oleh kemilau sinar yang kamu pancarkan, aku terbuai olehnya. Lalu salahkah jika rasa kagum ini aku kembangkan menjadi sebuah cinta? Salahkah bila sahabat menyukai sahabat lainnya? Maaf sekali jika kamu hanya menganggapku teman dan tak pantas untuk mencintai kamu. Aku manusia biasa yang dapat merasakan cinta, karena ketika sang cupid memanahkan panah asmaranya tepat ke hatiku dan di ujung panah tersebut ada nama kamu itu bukan salahku kan? Keindahan hidup adalah ketika dapat mencintai dan juga dicintai. Aku sudah mencintai kamu, lalu kapan kamu mencintai aku?

Sebenarnya aku rindu

Hari ini adalah hari yang selalu aku nantikan. Karena dia nginap di tempat anak-anak seperti biasanya (hanya setiap senin ato ketika dia tidak sedang ...). Namun hari ini tak cukup lama untukku habiskan meredam rinduku. Masih ada beberapa tetes lagi untuk mengobati dahaga rindu ini. Jika ada "penghubungku" di sini (lagi sakit) aku selalu punya alasan untuk ke tempat anak-anak, untuk bertemu dia. Tapi sayang sekali aku tidak bisa datang tiba-tiba tanpa ada sebuah alasan, meski alasan kuatku adalah untuk menemuinya. Sebenarnya aku rindu dia, sangat!!

Lirik It Will Rain by Bruno Mars

If you ever leave me, baby

Leave some morphine at my door

'Cause it would take a whole lot of medication

To realize what we used to have

We don't have it anymore

There's no religion that could save me

No matter how long my knees are on the floor

So keep in mind all the sacrifices I'm makin'

Will keep you by my side

And keep you from walkin' out the door

Cause there will be no sunlight

If I lose you, baby

There will be no clear skies

If I lose you, baby

Just like the clouds

My eyes will do the same if you walk away

Everyday, it'll rain, rain, rain

I'll never be your mother's favorite

Your daddy can't even look me in the eye

Oooo if I was in their shoes, I'd be doin' the same thing

Sayin' there goes my little girl

Walkin' with that troublesome guy

But they're just afraid of something they can't understand

O... but little darlin' watch me change their minds

Yea for you I'll try I'll try I'll try I'll try

I'll pick up these broken pieces 'til I'm bleeding

If that will make you mine

Cause there will be no sunlight

If I lose you, baby

There will be no clear skies

If I lose you, baby

Just like the clouds

My eyes will do the same if you walk away

Everyday, it will rain, rain, rain

Oh don't just say, goodbye

Don't just say, goodbye

I'll pick up these broken pieces 'til I'm bleeding

If that will make it right

Cause there will be no sunlight

If I lose you, baby

And there will be no clear skies

If I lose you, baby

And just like the clouds

My eyes will do the same if you walk away

Everyday, it'll rain, rain, rain

Adakah salah yg telah kulakukan padamu?

Seperti judulnya, apa aku pernah berbuat salah pada seseorang? Jika iya, aku harap ia mau berkata bahwa aku pernah lukai hatinya. Aku cuma gak mau punya musuh. Karna aku pun sudah kehilangan banyak sahabat yang aku bener2 sahabatku. Karna aku sudah terlalu banyak kehilangan. Mulai dari sosok ayah, teman yang aku sukai, sahabat yang anggap n kuanggap segalanya, dan harga diri. Mungkin aku sudah tak pantas untuk jadi apa-apa bagi orang-orang disekitarku. Aku gak tau arah hidupku lagi, karna satu-satunya alasan untuk aku bertahan telah menghancurkan hatiku, menghempaskan aku pada suatu kenyataan bahwa dialah orang yang harus aku benci. Kini aku hanya bisa menangis hening di balik tembok kamarku. Bahkan kini aku sangat tidak bisa menghargai kehadiran beliau dalam hidupku, padahal karna beliaulah aku bisa hidup sampai sebesar ini. Aku tumbuh menjadi orang yang sangat munafik dan terkadang menjengkelkan. Malah aku mendapatkan julukan tukang gondok (itu emang bawaan dari lahir cuy!!). Jadi sangat susah untuk mengubahnya, butuh waktu yang tidaklah sebentar. Maaf kepada seluruh pihak-pihak yang hatinya pernah sakiti entah disengaja atau tidak, aku cuma manusia biasa rek mohon dimaklumi saja.. Kalo gak bisa ya monggo jauhi diri ini tapi terima kasih kalo sudah mau mengerti aku.

Curhatan sebelum balik ke pulau garam

Hari ini, entah pukul berapa nanti, aku akan kembali ke tempat aku menuntut ilmu. Tempat di mana aku bisa bertemu pujaan hatiku, meski kami satu kota namun kami jarang untuk bertemu jika tidak ada acara tertentu. Bagiku ini sungguh menyiksa karena betapa anehnya kami yang satu kota hanya bisa bertemu jika di kampus. Oh God, aneh sekali! Tapi aku menerimanya. Esok hari aku akan bertemu dengannya setelah beberapa hari terpisahkan oleh hari libur. Aku gag sabar sekali, aku bener-bener kangen sama dia. Aku pengen banget mimpiin dia, tapi gag bisa. Kenapa ya? Padahal aku selalu memikirkannya (hal yang tak seharusnya). Seseorang berinitial A, aku kangen sama kamu!!!!

My Favorit Artis

Entah Mau kasih Judul Apa...

Kenapa akhir-akhir ini sikap dia jadi aneh giman gitu yah? Banyak hal yang bikin aku speechless cak! Yang pertama, pas di kontrakan dia bilang "Joek,mau kemana? Aku kok kamu tinggal, gag sayang sama aku tah?" pas aku mau berangkat kuliah. Sumpah, aku langsung gag bisa jawab apa2 (dia sadar gag ya?) Terus, pas aku sms dia tanya tugasnya udah selesai apa belum? Dia malah keheranan and kayak gag percaya kalo aku cuma sms buat tanya itu. (hoho,tau ajah yah dia!). Ada hal lain lagi lhow, ini yang bikin aku gag mau pergi dari dia malam itu tapi aku putusin untuk pergi ajah. Ceritanya aku mau garap LPJ, tapi diajak anak2 makan dulu. Berhubung mereka kelamaan berangkatnya dan aku gag dapet pinjeman printer malem itu, aku gag jadi ikutan pergi makan dan milih untuk garap LPJ. Pas aku mau pulang dia ngikutin aku keluar dan tanya kok aku gag ikutan makan bareng ajah? (kesannya dia gag pengen aku pergi, pi mungkin cuma perasaanku ajah deh!). Setelah aku selesai garap LPJ, aku pengen ketemu sama dia lagi. Tapi ternyata dia and anak2 malah ke pelbar. Aku pengen nyusulin, rencananya seh mau ngajag dua temenku sayangnya mereka udah ada dirombongan itu! Aku malah tengkar sama temen satu kosku karna pas aku ajak keluar buat nyusulin anak2, dia gak mau. Tau gag ada hal yang bikin aku bergetar dan nerves setengah mati? Saat aku nangis di kamar buat nyeselin perbuatanku tadi (tengkar sama temen kos dan ngerasa dilupain sama anak2), si doi malah telepon. Shit, aku gag bisa jawab apa2 tau! Aku kaget, cos dia telepon pake nomor temenku. Oh God, kesannya gimana gitu. Tapi, rabu ini kami ada rencana buat ke Pare dan dia gag bisa dihubungi kayak biasanya. Smsku buat ngajakin dia ke Pare itulah smsku terakhir ke dia. Aku belum sms or di sms sama dia sejak kejadian senin malam itu! Sekarang aku kangen dia banget.Jangan biarin aku berpaling dari kamu donk, aku gag mau orang lain. Aku cuma pengen kamu, ngerti gag seh?

You’re the One that I don’t Want By Alexandra Potter

                Lucy Hemmingway is twenty years old woman who is still unmarriage. She is born in Manchester city and moved to London to get her college. After she is graduated from the art department, she is being a painter but it’s not for a long time because she could not get money from that. So, she worked at a gallery in London and had a boss named Franky. One day her boss gave her an opportunity to move to New York, helps his friends, Magda Zuckerman. In New York, before she get her own apartment, Lucy stay with her old sister—Kate Hemmingway who is a successful lawyer and had been married with Jeff. She is type of woman who loves a discipline life and hates lateness. Then Lucy intends to have her own apartment so she share an apartment with Robyn, a massagerr in a spa in China Town. Nevertheless the place is small, she enjoy it.

            Luce—her nickname from her sister, have an ex-boyfriend named Nathaniel Kennedy. They met when both of them had a vacation in Venice, Italy. Luce thinks that Nate is her one; they are made for each other. Based on local belief, they kiss under the “Bridge of Sight” at sunset when the bell at the St. () are ringing, their love will be eternity love. Summer was over then they back each other to their own country, Nate to America and Luce back to London. They were dating one year by long distance relationship, but it was not work for long time. Nate broke up Luce because he found another woman and will marry her. Kate told Luce the news of Nate weddings which report in Times Magazine in order to Luce realize and moved on her life and forget Nate. But that was a hard things, although she is trying to date with other man, she still remember him.

            Ten years later, when she moved to New York, Nate does same things. He moved from Los Angles to New York. They met again when Nate bought up the entire stock of Gustav paint from the gallery where Luce works. Nate work as a television producer and life in penthouse in the middle of New York. He divorced with his ex-wife, Beth. So, they are dating again. It makes her sister going mad but Luce ignores it. Unfortunately, Nate had been changed to be another person who is Luce did not know. He is vegetarian now, did not drinks coffee again, and doing yoga. Nate transformed Luce to be another person likes he want and it makes Luce unhappy. He told Luce not to drinks coffee, but actually every morning she drinks coffee. One day, Nate and Luce mad to each other. Luce goes to museum (MoMA). In there she saw someone named Adam; they met intuitively in the road when Luce wants to visit her sister and met again in her gallery exhibition, he came without invitation and eat free there. Adam forces Luce to be his guide in that museum, after it he will tell her about films. In the evening, they say goodbye each other and subconsciously Luce fell loose him.

            When Luce saw her phone, there was a lot of miscall and messaged from Nate, then Luce tried to call him back. Nate gave her an hour to got ready because they will went to his friend’s party.  In fact, there was no time for her to get ready. She must done some things first before go. One hour later she still not ready yet and it makes Nate angry. In the party, Luce does not enjoy it and want to go back by herself. But Nate said he will pick her and they are disputed again in the cab when they want to decide where they will go, Nate’s penthouse or Luce’s small apartment? So, they break up again and hope that will not together anymore.

            Next following day, when Luce takes a walk to see his sister, she meets Nate in the road. They are bumping until coffee which Luce brings is spilled out. That was terrible for them. It is not the only coincidental they can meet, after it they meet again in the sushi bar. Then they meet in the gym and so many other things that make them meet each other. Robyn said that it’s because of universe do not want they are separated (the power of the local belief which they tried in Venice). Although they want to break up but they cannot and always meet again. Kate makes some note for Luce which is “the way to get rid from the one”. Different with Robyn who belief in power of spirit, she suggest Luce to do some ritual. For the result Luce arrested by the policeman and Adam who save her.

            The big trouble of their meet is happened when both of them go to Martha’s Vineyard. By accidentally they must stay in the same hotel because all hotels in that island were full. Luce tries the strategy from her sister (Kate thinks that all the coincident with Nate is Nate’s plan to back again with Luce). In the end of their trip in Martha’s Vineyard, Luce said that she love Nate. But Nate know that was lie, she do not loves him like before. He said that he really want to get rid from Luce and walk on his life.

            After came back to New York City, Luce going to date with Adam. They watch films that Adam’s love in the movie which is only they are and no one in that movie. Then they back to Luce’s apartment, when they are kissing suddenly Nate come and angry to Luce because of her, Beth does not want to reconciliation with Nate (Luce pick up the telephone when they are in Martha’s Vineyard which is from Beth). Adam being mad and go away from Luce. He does not pick up Luce’s call and reply her email or message. It makes her sad. Beside that her sister, Kate also faced a problem. Her husband got cancer that’s why Jeff body decreases in size. Robyn, her roommate is break up with her friend, Daniel (son of Magda). That was so complicated.

            The only one way to make it stop is she should back to Venice with Nate to brook the legend. When she is in Venice she takes walk around the piazzas and coincidently she met a man who told her about the legend. He said that the legend is powerful but the most powerful in the world is love. When she falls in love with another person it will make the legend broke. So, she meet Nate in the Bridge of Sight, there she accidentally fall to the river and Adam save her then they kiss under the bridge, so the legend between she and Nate is over. Jeff’s surgical operation has been successful and Kate being a new one who does not like to angry. Robyn and Daniel is finally being a couple after they are separated for a while. Then this novel ended by happy ending for all characters. They happily ever after, like what Luce wish for.